Category Archives: social

88. people who text you pointless one word replies

i hate short text messages

that smiley face just cost me $0.20, asshat.


83. veiled insults

things you shouldn't say when asking people for money

homeless dude to every woman on the A train, as he was trying to wrangle some change out of us:

“you’re so pretty. don’t mess it up. be nice.”

78. TMI facebook status updates

Picture 10

dear grade school friend who friended me on facebook,

i really, really didn’t need to know that you got boned this morning.


74. people who poke you to get your attention

the_pokei probably didn’t want to talk to you before you poked me, but i sure as hell don’t now.

73. going against your values

personal-valuesi’m really quite a nice lady (not that you can tell from this blog). i like being nice to people; it makes them feel good, it makes me feel good. it makes flowers bloom, babies laugh and angel choirs sing. or something. in reality, it probably just prevents overtly expressed attitude from most, with the glaring yet unavoidable exception of NYC drugstore clerks.

i was put in a situation recently that has since forced me to be a raging bitch to a particular group of people on a daily basis, and it does not feel great. my hippie montessori upbringing wants to know: can’t we all just get along?

the upside of it all is that i’ve made some realizations about my personal values and what i want out of life (to work part time and work out the other part of the time), which i don’t spend a ton of time thinking about, because i’m a godless heathen. so there’s that.

72. mixed signals

mixed_signals_sm_01i’m not even talking the sexy variety. i’m dealing with a project that’s become a nightmare–the client is telling us “forget everything, do only X!” and then two days later, comes back at us saying “why the eff isn’t Y being done?”

i feel like i’m taking crazy pills. actually, i’d probably feel better if i were taking crazy pills.

69. email critiques

PRZ-007376i take criticism at work very seriously.

if there’s a problem, yo, i’ll solve it.

but i swear to god, if i get one more phone call that starts, “why did/didn’t you say x to the client?” when i just spoke to you about what i was going to write to the client, i am going to have a motherfucking conniption. if you want me to say something specific, tell me, or write it yourself. or leave me alone to do my work like a capable adult who earned a degree from a respectable university.

photo of vanilla ice from back in the day, because he reminds me that someone in the world always has it worse than you do.

(nice pants.)